Crap.
Crap. Crap.
Crapcrapcrapcrapcrapcrapcrapcrapcrapcrapcrapcrapcrap.

I knew it was bad news when that slut moved into the house.You can tellby just looking at her that she has no morals. Why the human things let her come in, I'll never know. Stoopid humans. And in she comes, dragging her stinky brood with her. Stoopid kittens have taken over the house. Kittens and their skanky mother everywhere I look.
But did I complain/ No.
Did i fuss? No.
Did I have a big ol' hissy fit? No.
I dealt with it. I accomodated. I adjusted. Heck, I even kinda like that little Laika Bean kid. She's sorta sweet, in a tabby kind of way (Tabbies rule!)
But this.. This ?!?!?!

More kittens?!?!?!?!
No.
Nononononononononono!
They are freakin' everywhere.
I tried to ignore them. That worked for a week or so. Then they started to miew.So I employed my magickal powers of selective deafness. But then they started to wobble around the house. It's hard to ignore stoopid kittens when they are crawling all over one's house. Now they are beginning to show interest in my food and water bowl. Crap! Stoopid kittens and their stank-ho mother!!

My life really sucks right now.

I miss the old days when there WERE NO KITTENS IN MY HOUSE!!

Wow, I haven't been around much lately, have I? First, the Grrfriend came for a visit. Then, the mama thing got a new job (like she really had time for anything other than taking care of my needs!) and she hasn't been around much to turn the compooter on for me. And, now, our pooter is acting all weird and crashy.
And, this time, the crashing has nothing to do with me. Or the kittens, even.
I did hear the mama thing on the fone, today, having a loud "conversation" with the fone people things. And that is how our pooter gets to the 'nets, you know. She called them all sorts of things (after she hung) that I won't post here, for fear of the FCC forever ending my pooter privileges. I told her she should have said those things to the people before she hung up, so hey could actually hear her. But she never listens to me. The human things never do.
So, it seems that, sooner or later, we will be getting a better way to the 'nets. Hopefully, that will stop of the crashy-ing. I told the mama thing that, just in case, she should get rid of the kittens, too. But, once again, she didn't listen to me. Stoopid mama thing. Her life would go much smoother if she took all of my advice.
Smoother for her and more tuna and cream cheeses for me. She really shouldlisten to me more often.

My human grrrfriend thing is coming!
She is coming tomorrow!
Yayayayayayayayayay!

Duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuude!
The daddy thing just brought in the loveliest bunch of wild nip from the garden of herbage.
Me and the kittens just imbibed. Seriously imbibed.
Those funny little kittens. Cute little scamps...


...Err, woah. I must be really, really stoned.

Hi, gang.
We are very sad around here. My eldest brother, the Sammy Cat, died last Thursday night. He was 221 years old (I think I have that right; he was really really old).
If you remember, I had mentioned that he been having trouble eating. Well, it turns out that this was because he had had a stroke. I don't really know what that means, other than that his tongue had developed a mind of its own and wouldn't help him when it came time to eat and drink and groom. And Sammy loved to groom, poor fellow. But the human things were doing their best to help him out with all of that.
However, by Thursday, Sammy was getting very tired from having to fight with his own tongue all the time. And he decided he really didn't want to anymore. So, he spent the day saying good bye to everybody then went to his favorite sunning spot to curl up and wait for Bast to come for him. The little kitten, Zen, who will make one heck of a High Priest to our Fair Goddess when he is grown, sat with him for his Final Wait. I was too choked up to do the priestly duties, myself. But Zen did a smash-up job of it.
At 2:30 in the morning, Zen came out and told the daddy thing that Bast had come. Sammy had gone on to the Glorious Goddess's Party.
We will miss him, but we know that he has joined his bestest bud, the Old Boober Tubbs, who he has missed terribly. And, after a couple of centuries, he deserves his rest.
We will miss you, buddy!

Well, then.
That Masami creature has had to sPend her days, lately, locked up in the bathroom or in kitty jail. And if she isn't in kitty jail, then the FC is locked up in kitty jail.
I really didn't see this turn of events coming.
But that doesn't mean I won't love every single minute of it.
My enemies are finally getting what they deserve.

Oh, and my profectinal fotograpper human grrrfriend thing is coming to visit soon.
Yeeeeeessssssssss!

He didn't have to share it with everyone

Wake me when the heat is over.
This summer stuff really sucks.

My brother Sam has finally gotten so old (he is 21) that he has trouble eating dried kibble. Very sad for him.
Except that our human things have figured out that he can eat the wet stuff just fine. Good for him.
And best for me is that he makes such a big mess gumming all that wet and juicy food that he flings bits and pieces all over the place when he eats it. And you know that I am such a nice guy that I am happy to clean up after him. Must keep the home tidy, after all.

And only one of them, sadly.
Maftet, one of the little urchins that my stoopid human things have decided to keep, doesn't like cat nip. In fact, she hates it. She runs from the room when it is around, like it offends her nose.
Clearly, she is damaged. But this is damage that I can live with.
I just wish her mother and the other four devil-spawn had the same damage. They keep stealing MY nip!!!!

I have the foto-grappic proof that not only is she a skank ho, but she is a cat-crack skank ho:


Shot at 2007-07-27

Gimme back my nip, biatch!

Heheheheheh.
Kittens are scared of storms.
They don't have the power to make the Windmonster cry.


Their stoopid mama only growls and hides.



Silly kittens, afraid of a little old weather.


Oh, and if you need me, I'll be taking a, um, nap under the bed. Yeah, that's it. I'm really, really sleepy.
Yup, sleepy.

Oh, good Bast! The stoopid crazy human things have decided that we are keeping two of the kittens.
Bah!




Huff.




Bah!

Yeah, yeah, the kittens are adorable and cute and precious and blah blah blah-ity blah.
But that doesn't mean that I don't need attention!
At least, you could let me spend some time on line while you are busy ignoring me with some stoopid kittens.



My human things need a serious talking to.

First, I got the kittens and their mama locked up in the bafroom.
Now, I made the wind monster grumble and cry.


I am one powerful dude.

Well, they are all in the house, now. The good news being, of course, that there won't be any more coming in.
If you would like a few snapshots of my living hell, you should check out the mama thing's journal, where she has posted snapshots of each of the little buggers, with something cutesy to say about each of them. Gack.
Ah, my life used to be a simple, lovely thing, in which the worst thing I had to stress about was the Wind Monster. Those were the good old days.
Pity me.

My house has been over-run by kittens. And the daddy thing says there is at least on more to come.
!
Those stoopid kittens even got to hog the bafroom all to themselves all night, last night. Perhaps they need a little more fiber in their diets, no?
The daddy thing's got the idea now, though: He's got all four of those buggers locked in a cat carrier, for the moment. He says they are sleeping where they can feel safe. I say, while they are in there together, let's just pitch the whole thing out the front door! I think that is an excellent idea!
Oh, and they skank? She is outside looking for her last kitten right now. Typical ghetto whore: So many babies she can't even keep track of them. Phah!


Stoopid kittens and their stoopid mother, invading my house, hanging out in my bathroom, eating my food and getting my scritches. They should just go back where they came from. Dumb stoopid helpless things. Puh.

There are five of them.
Five!!!!!
And the daddy thing is trying to get them all to come into the house.
Puhh!
He says it's so that he and the mama thing can get them used to people so that they can find the stoopid things homes. But that means they are gonna live here for at least awhile.
And, and, and...that SLUT has actually been in the house!!! My house!!!! The daddy thing picked her up and gave her the grand tour!
This is soooooo not gonna happen. Nope. No way. No how. Nuh-uh.
I am going on strike.




Not a hunger strike, mind you. But a strike nonetheless.

So, the daddy thing started feeding the neighborhood 'ho and her mewling kittens. Disgusting.
And who said she could eat my food? That's what I wanna know!
And I think I heard the mama thing say that she thought that they might keep the wench if they could place the kittens....I'll tell them where to place the kittens!
I might actually hafta forgive the daddy thing for wasting my food, though. He says he doesn't want another cat. You tell 'em, Daddy Thing! We don't need no more cats in here. 'Specially no stinky, food-and-nip-stealing skank!




(She still is kinda hot, though.


Don't tell anyone I said so.)

This is the biatch whose been eating all my organic catnip.
You can see what a dirty skank-ho she is.
I want her to leave now.